From the Rector: Marriage
Here are some Frequently asked Questions concerning Marriage with answers provided by the National Conference of Catholic Bishops. Please Contact a priest at the parish to help you discern and prepare for Marriage. Ordinarily 6 months of preparation are necessary.
How do I know if I’m ready to marry?
- Do most people consider you emotionally mature, able to compromise, communicate well, share your feelings, and handle anger constructively?
- Do you love this other person so much that you are willing to put his or her happiness before your own?
- Are you marrying out of strength (I know who I am and am happy with myself) rather than weakness (I need someone to fill the gaps in my personality)?
- Have you developed strong friendships that have lasted over time?
- Are you able to keep commitments and delay gratification?
- Do you struggle on a regular basis with harmful habits or addictions, e.g. to alcohol, drugs, or pornography? That’s not necessarily a reason not to marry, but it is something that left untreated can seriously weaken your ability to have a healthy marriage.
- Is God calling you to marriage? Have you prayed and discerned about this?
How do I know if this is the right person?
- Do you share similar basic values about respecting human life, fidelity, commitment, what’s right and wrong, honesty, life goals, and lifestyle?
- Does your significant other bring out the best in you, and you in him or her?
- Are you physically attracted to this person?
- Can you imagine growing old together?
- Do your trusted family members and friends support your relationship and affirm that it’s healthy and respectful?
- Do you experience ongoing conflict or, worse, violence and abuse in your relation ship? That is a red flag to slow down and seek advice and help, ensuring your safety if necessary.
- Is God calling you to marriage with this person? Have you prayed and discerned about this?